It feels silly admitting this but a dream of mine ever since I was young has always been to work at a retail makeup counter.

Reminiscing on religiously visiting my local mall’s makeup counter every weekend in my teens floods me with such intense nostalgia. I worshipped the girls who worked there for their flawless, airbrushed faces, impossibly glittery eyes, and boldly bright, over-drawn lips. They probably considered me a pest as I had always brought more questions than money with me. When I did have money, I would blow it all on limited edition lipsticks and pigments in an attempt to replicate their ultra-glam, “full beat” look, as they would call it. I wanted to be like them so bad, so I took their word as scripture. To me, they were, and still are, the original influencers.

Well, last year my dream came true. I had been working as a freelance makeup artist for a while at the time and anybody who’s worked in freelance makeup before knows it doesn’t quite always pay the bills. There was one moment I distinctly remember when I opened up the banking app on my phone and felt personally attacked by the available balance in my account. I filled out the application online right then and there and before the month was over, I had my first job in retail makeup.

Navigating The Beauty Counter with Confidence

One of the first things I learned was that most people don’t feel confident navigating stores that sell cosmetics. All of the different options for brands and products that our highly saturated beauty industry has to offer us can be overwhelming. The average person doesn’t know the difference between a concealer and a corrector and likely doesn’t want to– they just want me to tell them what will make their dark circles go away. People have busy lives. They are not concerned about the distinctions between BB creams, tinted moisturizers, and skin tints. They just want to know which one will work for them and what color to buy.

I spent a lot of my time making connections with people and trying to equip them with the tools they need to be their own personal shoppers. I’m naturally an introvert so being thrust into a position that required constant social interaction was daunting for me. However, I figured through my years of knowledge and experience as a makeup artist, I could build solid relationships with my clients by helping to take the weight of the beauty world off their shoulders.

Figuring Out What’s Most Flattering

Most of my clients’ inquiries were about finding that perfect shade for them– whether it was foundation, concealer, blush, or lipstick. I realized quickly that I wasn’t going to be able to explain the ins and outs of color theory to every person coming to me for help. And as much as I’d like to, sometimes there simply isn’t enough time in the day to hold their hand throughout their entire shopping experience. Most days we were so busy that we only had five minutes to give to each client at a time. So instead, I focused my efforts on encouraging my clients to use their own skills to do the hard work themselves.

Studying Your Skin

Let’s say you came to me looking for a bold new lip color: I’d first ask you what kind of color you usually go for, so I could gauge your idea of what flatters you best. Then, I’d take you to a mirror to take a look at your skin and try to determine your undertone (most people are either neutral, cool, or warm). You can figure that out by going out in the sun with a mirror or your phone and analyzing your skin. If your skin leans more yellow or red, you’re likely warm, however, if your skin leans more towards pink or blue then you’re probably cool. If you find that you’re somewhere in between, there’s a good chance you’re neutral (in fact, when it comes to complexion products, I always try the neutral shade first).

Once you understand your undertone, all you need to do is look for shades that have similar undertones to your own. Through studying yourself this way you start to develop a keen eye for what sorts of colors are most flattering on you. Suddenly, that seemingly endless assortment of lipsticks lining the shelves of your local retail makeup counter isn’t so overwhelming anymore.

Learning to Take Things in Stride

Another thing that I learned early on was that people don’t always treat retail workers with respect. Some people didn’t care how nice I was to them or how big I smiled at them when greeting them. They didn’t care that I only had so much room on my forearm to swatch lipstick shades on as they showed their wife on FaceTime from another country across the globe. Some people didn’t seem to care how much I was trying to help them. They didn’t seem to care about anything other than buying that one item that they simply must have now, or else some kind of catastrophic event would shatter their world. And if I didn’t have it, then I was useless to them, and they made sure I knew it.

At first, those kinds of encounters with rude, demanding clients would rattle me. I had never been one to be a people pleaser in my personal life, but now it was my job to build & maintain relationships with clients. My ego never had any place in the matter, not if I wanted to keep getting paid. Sometimes, the best way out of a tense situation is to tell a client that you’re going to find someone who can better assist them and to walk away. I’d often go back home at night and have to do a lot of decompressing, often involving scented candles, fast food, long showers, and watching my favorite shows like The Nanny or Bob’s Burgers on my laptop in bed. Nothing has taught me the importance of self-care or how to give myself grace more than working in retail makeup.

Giving Myself Grace

Don’t get me wrong, I loved my job. But eventually, I gave so much of myself to trying to be the perfect beauty consultant that I didn’t really have time for myself anymore. I became burnt out and overworked and, it being my first job, I was too afraid to communicate that to anybody. I started being more critical of myself. My mood began to shift, and it was obvious to those around me. I even started to develop terrible eczema. So, after quite some time of this, I made the difficult decision to leave to focus on my physical and mental well-being.

Looking back, I wish I had spoken up for myself and prioritized my work-life balance more. Perhaps the most important thing I learned from working in retail makeup is that I’m only human. My experience working in retail makeup has taught me an invaluable lesson: that as hard as I may try, I’ll never be perfect, but I’ll always be good enough.